Sussudio: Reflections

I recently had the old Genesis tune "Sussudio" stuck in my head, so I downloaded it, and I'm pretty confused (more than most of the time). First, what does it mean? Is it the girl's name? Is it a pick-up line? The safety word? Personally, I'm heavily leaning towards Voodoo curse. Maybe I should try it once in awhile:

ME: Hey, honey. Let me buy you a drink.
CUTE GIRL: Uh, no thanks. And please stop grabbing yourself.
ME: HOW DARE YOU!! SUS-SUS-SUSSUDIO!!!
CUTE GIRL: No..gak.......(pause, pause, pause)...wanna go to my place?
ME: Thanks Phil Collins!

Or something like that.

Unrelated, I think something is wrong with my insect screen, because as I speak bugs are swarming me: my skin, my computer, one just flew in my mouth, etc. Occasionally, there is a really big one that makes a lot of noise, which makes me sort of nervous to go to sleep. I am worried I might wake up and be missing arms. Just another hazard-filled country night, I suppose.

Since I haven't been doing to much with my life the past few weeks, I have been doing some thinking (and I kinda learned the Cure's "Lullaby" on guitar. Rock on!). Times are changing here. I'm starting to feel a little alienated in my group of friends here. It's not that I find anything particularly wrong with them, it's just my college friends are a lot different, and to be honest, a lot deeper than most of my friends here. Let me go into something else. So throughout most of high school, the group of people I hung out with most were band people (just get the insults out now, please). Over the summer, I sort was "in between groups." I hung out with a lot of different people, but a lot of my time was spent with a sort of revamped version of our old group, which included a few musical people. Now there was nothing wrong with this, but now that is only group I really hang out with. I guess you could say I feel a little repressed. I always feel a little uncomfortable hanging out, and I don't really know why. I think what might add to it is that almost all the girls we hang out with are dating someone far away, while all the guys, including myself, are single, without many (at least local) perspective girlfriends, which somehow adds this weird tension that I can pick up. There also seems to be this strong notion that this could very well be the last summer we all hang out together. I feel a little like Locke in one of the last episodes of LOST this season (did you see that season finale? It was NUTS!!), as he was informing Sawyer that he wasn't really a part of the beach people or the Others, he said "I'm on my own path now." I think that sort sums up how I kinda feel right now. We'll see, there's still a long summer ahead.

Please don't take this personally at all, this is meant to be an airing of emotions, not an attack of any kind (including you, Genesis).

I really need that Starbucks job.

--B@rry